Dose of Prose
I posed a question to my Instagram followers earlier this week asking if they felt like they couldn’t workout due to lack of motivation or lack of equipment. The results of the poll yielded an even, 50-50 split, which prompted me to write today’s post.
I love fitness, health and wellness, but I know it’s not everybody’s “thing,” nor does it have to be. I’m also aware that there are multiple complexities and sensitivities that go along with the topics of body image and the relationship that people have with the food they eat. I’m not a dietician, nutritionist, physician, personal trainer, nor am I a therapist. It is not my place nor is it my business to tell you how to live your life. However, I felt compelled to write this post because fitness and wellness are important to me, and I want to share my story. My intention is to use my platform to promote the positive benefits of living a balanced, healthy lifestyle.
My Fitness Journey
Before we get into this blog post, I thought it would be helpful to give some insight and context into my personal fitness journey. I’ve always been small/slim – I am 5’4″ and my weight ranges approximately 120-130 lbs. When I was in middle school and high school, I attempted to do some sports (I briefly played tennis and ran track), but honestly, I just didn’t like it nor was I coordinated enough to be an asset to the teams that I was on (I was playing soccer in P.E. one day and scored a goal for the opposite team, I’ll just leave it at that). I only wore glasses (no contacts) back then so I was always afraid of the ball hitting my face lol. Anyway, my main form of exercise growing up was dance and yoga. I even tried out for the dance team in college…didn’t make the cut, but A for effort I suppose.
I don’t believe that my fitness journey began; however, until the latter half of college, around 2014. I was extremely busy, stressed and overwhelmed with classes and club meetings. I tried to force myself to go to the campus gym but quite frankly I didn’t know what to do when I went there. I couldn’t even figure out how to turn the elliptical machine on! Basically I would get on the treadmill for 10 minutes, get bored and leave. I also felt self-conscious because everyone around me seemed to know what they were doing. Luckily, my campus was literally on a hill, so I did quite a bit of walking, but even still, it never felt like enough.
Why I Started Working Out
One day I had one (of many) mental breakdowns to my parents. I don’t even remember what it was about but I’m sure it had to do with me having a bajillion exams and homework to do. Anyway, I distinctly remember my dad saying to me, “Kaamilah, you’ve got to go to the gym or take a fitness class or something. Find a way to get this stress off of you!” And in that moment, a lightbulb went off in my head. I was sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. I walked into the campus gym again, but this time I decided to pay for a semester of group fitness classes. I figured if I paid for it, then that would kind of force me to go in a sense. Also, I liked the idea of having an instructor present to help guide me since I clearly didn’t know what I was doing when it came to exercise.
The first class I took was a spin class (aka indoor cycling on a stationary bike). I was so nervous going into it and didn’t know what to expect. I had to take multiple breaks during the class and I felt so out of shape compared to others, but at the same time, I was at ease due to the encouragement I received from the instructor and the sense of community that was established by the other students in the class. The way I felt physically after the class was indescribable. I had real, natural energy (better than any amount of caffeine) and I completely forgot about whatever it was that stressed me out previously. For the first time in a long time, I felt relaxed.
My Relationship with Food + Fitness
The rest is history. I continued to go to that spin class and it became a part of my routine. It was my ‘me time’ where I could get away, just for 30 minutes from everyone and everything that was driving me crazy. I didn’t notice my body changing until I started to receive compliments from my friends and family about the way I looked. Most importantly, I was in a much better place mentally and emotionally. When I moved to California and began graduate school, I expanded my horizons and tried other group fitness classes such as barre, pilates, high intensity interval training (HIIT) and boxing. By taking all of these different classes I’ve gained some knowledge about ways to enhance your workout. For more information about that as well as some of my gym bag essentials, check out my blog post here.
In terms of food, I think that’s an entire separate blog post in of itself, but I’ll give the abbreviated version for now. When I was younger, I used to count calories and it’s something that I don’t do anymore and will never do again. I’ve had my fair share of trying different diets (literally I went from only eating and loving meat to being completely vegan and everything in between). Basically, my relationship with food is…complicated, but over time with a ton of trial and error, the conclusion that I’ve come to is that eating clean and eating intuitively is what works for me. My peers would always (they still do) give me a hard time about how ‘healthy’ I am, but trust me, there’s a method to my madness. I have a sensitive stomach and food intolerances/allergies; as a result, I cook most of my food myself and try not to eat out too often. Click here if you want more in depth meal prep ideas and grocery guidance. My meals consist of lean proteins, veggies and healthy carbs. I don’t eat a ton of red meat and in general I try to eat halal meat. I’m from the South (the hub of fried food), I have a major sweet tooth and I like junk food as much as the average person does, so, if I’m craving something or want to treat myself, I do it. I’m all about balance!
rice, buffalo cauliflower, brussel sprouts and baked chicken from Erewhon Market
Finding My Figure & Fitness Goals
I never had a specific workout goal in mind. When I was younger (during that same time that I counted calories and being thin was the standard of beauty…funny how being ‘curvy’ is the standard of beauty now, ugh gotta love trends 🙄) I was fixated on how much I weighed, but as I began to mature and build confidence, I was no longer focused on the numbers nor meeting any societal standard. Instead, I focused on what felt good for me and my body. When you feel good, you look good. If you’re curious about sweating in style, check out my blog post about how to protect and preserve your hair during workouts.
In Los Angeles, I would workout about 2x a week and have active rest days, meaning I would do yoga and/or walk a ton. Currently, since I’m quarantining in Arkansas and COVID-19 is happening, I do virtual workouts at home via Instagram Live and/or Zoom (I enjoy them both but I especially love Zoom because it’s more personal and the instructor can see you and correct your form in real time) about 3-4x a week. They usually consist of a combination of strength training and cardio. Overtime I have both lost weight and built lean, toned muscle in my abs, legs and arms. For me personally, I’ve seen the real results come in based on consistency, slow yet controlled movements, repetitions, recovery and clean eating.
Genetics also plays a role in the way I achieved my figure of course, but it’s important to note that it IS possible to build a butt – trust me. I think I’ve seen so many fake booties and boobies in LA that they all blur together in my eyes, but I am telling you right here right now, you can get the results that injections give you for free by just putting in the work. Note – it’s not going to be easy. It’s difficult to stay motivated. It’s hard to replicate the experience of a gym and fitness studio at home. I get it and I feel you. But, nothing worth having is easy, right?
Now that you have some context about my fitness journey (hopefully that wasn’t too long of a read) here are some tips and mentalities that have helped me to show up and stay active for myself, every day. I hope that these will encourage you to workout and enjoy it as much as I do. I made these tips and tricks into infographics so that you can easily screenshot them for yourself and/or share with someone who may need a push in the right direction.
How to Stay Motivated to Workout
How to Workout without Equipment
Working from Home – Quarantine Edition
Last but not least, here’s a video montage time-lapse of some of my quarantine workouts from home. I’m continually working towards correcting my form, building strength and prioritizing recovery but hey that’s why it’s called a fitness journey. I hope that this post was helpful and resonated with you. I’m always taking applications for fitness friends so if you’re looking for someone to sweat with and hold you accountable, hit me up! I usually check-in and post my workouts weekly on Instagram so we can connect there. Until next time.
-Kaamilah
